Tuesday, November 11, 2008
i
ve nth better t do now
nd at e same time
ima thinking
alot alot so decided t come
nd blog. i think life is boring.
ima not saying that spending time w
superboy is boring.
ima just trying t say that.. life is really boring la. how
shld i explain.. like
ima doing e same thing almost everyday. but i need t do it. for example working. i need t work almost everyday because i need t earn money. sometimes i enjoy working because it kills my time
nd at e end of e day wen i get my voucher i will feel very satisfied. on
mon, i do 2 t 4
nd this is really crazy. although we only need t portion 4 courses out of e 8 but still very rush. luckily at e 6
th dish, 2 of e tables left
nd my partner
nd i did 2 t 2. e whole D&D ended at 10pm. very early can! luckily it ended early if not i think we need t
ot until 3am
alr lor.
tmr i will b
gg down t
MDIS nd check e courses
nd price
nd alot of things la. i
cnt just stop here right. w a very very very very bad N
lvl cert. i need
smth else.
smth more.
smth higher. right right?
haas. but i will just
check first because i don't really
ve e intention t study now. perhaps next yr or
smth? studying is not my top priority now. i
ve smth else in mind. or
shld i say
alot more things in mind?
haas. like buying this
nd that
nd moving out. i know dear don't really support me moving out but sometimes i really
ve e urge t. sometimes wen i chat w my parents or brothers, i really can't bear t leave just like that. it's not like they ill treat me or
smth. i guess
ima still young
nd rebellious that's y? but i really c no point staying at home since
ima not at home most of e time
nd i really dislike t follow e
'rules nd regulations' at home. i really don't understand y. since he alr don't pin any hopes on me thn y must he care? i know he care because ima still his daughter afterall but in some ways.. y shld he ve those rules at home? hais. mayb e problem lies w me because i don't like them t interfere w wad i do? mayb i shld just admit that ima wilful nd rebellious lor. wad t do. i know ima not a father or mother of anyone nd i can't understand how much they care for me, how hard they tried t satisfy our needs, how hard my dad works t give us a better life, how much of hse work my mum ve t do t let us live in such a clean nd nice enviroment nd lastly, how disappointed nd heart pain they felt wen i did very hurtful things t them. i know.. but there is nth i can do t mend it. my dad just wants me t study until poly or at least O lvl but i failed t do so. a very simple task yet i didn't managed t do it. i really don't know. i think this post is getting out of point. ima trying t say that i wanna move out but ended up i typed smth else here. i will just type whatever is in my mind now. nd one last reason y i don't wanna stay at home is because sometimes, sometimes wen i c how upset or unhappy my mum is, i feel very sad too. sometimes i really feel like giving her a hug nd ask her not t feel sad but i just can't do it. ever since i grow up, there seems t b a gap between me nd my parents nd siblings alr. we can talk sometimes but only talk.. nth much. i don't know y. mayb we don't know or we choose not t express our love nd care for each other? this is weird. very weird.just now while i was talking t dear nd i randomly talked abt our honeymoon period. ima really afraid that our honeymoon period will b over soon. i know i shldn't think so much nd sometimes i seriously hate myself for thinking so damn much but i can't help it. ima always thinking alot nd very sensitive. wo ye bu xiang de.. ke shi wo zhen de mei ban fa. pls bear w me. although i know that e period will definitely b over nd it's only a matter of wen it will come t an end but i still hope that even if it's after a few months or even yrs, we will still b together. i hope that we can ALWAYS feel comfortable nd good w each other ard. i hope that we can rely nd trust each other nd ve a very very peaceful r/s for a long time. although there will always b ups nd downs, obstacles or anything, i hope that we can g thru them. i know it's easier said thn done. ppl might change. who knows wad will happen next? nobody can predict e future but i really really hope things will b good for us. just now dear suddenly say "wo yao gen ni chu guo." very cute la. haahaas. i don't know y but i just feel that he's very cute nd sweet wen he said that. nd i smile t him. ima definitely gg overseas w him nd dear said that he will bring me t KL. ((: loves! i can love u like no one can, i can be ur SUPERGIRL! :DD
@ 11:50 PM